it hurts to see them go

it feels like being force to let them go, in the sea of all kinds of people. the hand that I keep holding on to and the hand that I tried really hard to pull to the right direction. it just so hard to let go. it feels like some part of me just gone. vanish. empty. it breaks me into pieces and it brought me tears.

but why must I be scared?
why must I be sad?
why must I even care?

because we are sisters. even though we are not related by blood, but we are related by iman and aqidah. you all are my little ones that are placed so close to me.

the desire to bring them to walk this road is so bad, to the extend where it becomes so scary and nerve wrecking if they make the wrong turn. because there is no way that I will always hold on to them. showing them the direction for them to choose. I wont be there at all time to tell them the right path to take. I wont be there to look and guide them. because I dont have those capability. I dont have the energy, and all of that I understand. Because, they are not in this road, and will never be istiqamah in choosing the same road, if it is not because of Allah swt.

and due to that, even though it hurts to see them go. to leave them to someone else, may Allah swt guide you always, and may Allah swt gives you His blessing at all time. And remember, if one day you are the one standing in front of the gate, please pull me with you. and if it is me, I want to pull every single one of my little ones, and every single one of my sister that stay so close to my heart. because there's nothing that we should do in this dunia, if it is not for the sake of Allah swt. and due to that, may Allah swt grant His blessing and always reward us with hearts that are clean and pure of any bad intention. Instead of bad hearts and bad intentions, may Allah swt exchange it with the heart of sincerity.

insyAllah...take care little ones, and dont forget to come back...